My Did

When I signed a two year contract for my job in Singapore, my first thought was how will I survive that long without seeing my family??  I knew I would be home for Christmas in between, but as I said goodbye at the airport on December 27, 2009 I distinctly remember the sinking feeling in my chest thinking that I wouldn't hug my mom, dad or sisters for an entire year.  Previously I think the longest I had ever gone without seeing them was a a couple months in college.  I lived only an hour and half away, so I was able to be around for every holiday, every birthday, and even when I just needed some of Mom's TLC.  The realization that I would not be able to jump in the car and drive to see them was enough to make me seriously doubt if I could actually do this.  But I did. 

Thanks to advances in technology, living on the other side of the world is nothing like it used to be.  I can Email, Gchat, Facebook and Skype anyone from home pretty much when I want to.  This has been the biggest blessing for me, because as "brave" as I might seem since I made the move over here, I am still very much dependent on the words of encouragement and love from my family and friends. 

The reason I say all of this is because the day that my Dad told me that my 24th birthday present would be sending Ellen, my 20 year old sister, was seriously the greatest day up until that point.  She couldn't have come at a better time.  She arrived at my 6-month mark...which everyone here will agree is the "6 month slump".  My parents can attest to the fact that Ellen and I didn't always get along when we were younger.  Once I started my teen years, we fought allll the time - whether it be over borrowing clothes, having to drive to school her to school, or our completely different morning habits.  My mom used to always say, "I just want you to be friends."  Once I left for college something clicked, and we have been best friends and "Dids" ever since.  (I won't get into how we created the nickname "Did", but it includes Ellen as a two year old with a speech impediment).  Her trip to visit was enough to get me through my first year and for that I am so thankful!  

One of my favorite stories happens before she even arrived into Singapore.  If you know Ellen, you will definitely be able to picture what I'm about to describe...

Those who know us, know that we are VERY different.  We might look like twins, but our personalities and our habits are as opposite as possible.  So when Ellen flew out of Houston, to Amsterdam, and onwards to Singapore by herself, I was right to be slightly concerned.  She texted me once she landed in Amsterdam to let me know she had made it.  I quickly responded telling her to text me when she got onto the plane for Singapore.  Hours later...no text.  I tried calling and texting her.  No response.  I checked her flight online and it was on schedule, but the fact that I hadn't heard from her made me freak out, thinking she had missed the flight or gotten into some sort of trouble.  I called the airline in the hopes that they could confirm that she got on the flight.  Thanks to 9-11 the guy pretty much laughed as he said "We can't release that kind of information".  That's when I began to get hysterical.  (Ellen is the laid back one - I am the over reactor.)  I called the airline again, and this time I was lucky to get a woman.  Through tears I told her that my baby sister was flying through Amsterdam and as far as I knew she had been kidnapped and sold.  Luckily she was a bit more understanding and informed me that "I can't tell you if she's on the plane...but I can tell you that all the scheduled passengers were accounted for".  *Sigh of relief*.  As I waited by the gate to pick her up, I saw everyone from her flight walk through - except her.  I freak out again, thinking the lady must have gotten it wrong.  Sure enough, an HOUR after she landed...her comes Ellen - swinging her ponytail and sauntering along.  She informed me later that her phone had died and she hadn't thought to charge it, she had gotten lost in the airport (which is pretty much impossible in Singapore) and then she got distracted by a few stores.  Wow.  I could have killed her if I didn't want to hug her so badly.  Oh well, that's my Did.

Our time together was ridiculously fun.  She was in Singapore for a few days where we did the silly "touristy" stuff.  

Had to eat at Hooters for Pop :)

Indian Temple

Chinatown

She met a few of my teacher friends and got to experience Singaporean live music, which consists of remakes of Journey, Lady Gaga and Backstreet Boys.

At Insomnia

We also did what every girl in her twenties did around this time - went to see Sex and the City 2 in the theater.  Not the greatest movie of all time, but seeing it together, in Singapore, was priceless.

Next, it was time to get out of Singapore!  We went to Thailand with Julian (poor guy) where we stayed in Phuket for a couple nights before taking a ferry to the most GORGEOUS place on earth - Phi Phi Island.  It was a slice of Heaven.  We rode in long boats, ate local food, Ellen got proposed to by a few local men and given jewelry...just your average vacation. :)  Words can't really describe the awesomeness of this place so I'll let the pictures do the talking, but the only thing that made it even more amazing was getting to experience it with my Did.  She makes everything more fun (I'm pretty sure anyone who knows her will agree with me on that).  

Being Dids at the airport

                                              

Phuket, Thailand

Saying hi to the elephants

"All Day!"

Phi Phi Island

Island gear - check!

Long Boat

"The Beach" (from the movie with Leo DiCaprio!)

Engagement #1 - the one who gave jewelry

Engagement #2 - the one who made a heart out of a straw

Paradise

So thank you Did for all the amazing memories...and thank you Dad for making it possible. :) 

Dearest Emma - before you say that I forgot all about you - don't worry - there's a whole blog coming your way soon :)

Home is Where the Heart Is

Everyone has heard that cliche saying a million times before..."Home is where the heart is."  And under normal circumstances that is almost always true.  No matter how you might try, nothing seems to live up to Mom's home-cooking, long chats with Dad, goofing off with your sisters and cuddling with your pets.  Despite how strong or independent you may be, the moment you enter your parent's house you are 5 years old again, just wanting to be taken care of.  At least that's how I feel when I am home.  I am also aware that I am lucky enough to feel so safe and secure in my home and to have a family that welcomes me with open arms anytime I am around.  

So for me, "Home is where the heart is" has always made perfect sense.  My heart always felt the most complete when I was there - surrounded by my closest friends and family.  Being a self-proclaimed "hater-of-change" my entire life, I had no doubts that this simple statement would always be my truth.  

Fast forward to present day - As I reach my year and half mark of living in Singapore, I start to wonder if it is at all possible for your heart to be in two places at once.  Although I don't necessarily feel the connection with Singapore as I do with my real home, I have created a life here.  A life where the once impossible is now possible.  I have been fortunate enough to see places that probably wouldn't even show up on a map.  I have seen coastlines that I never even dreamed I would see with sunsets that would make the even the harshest critic melt.  I've experienced the good, the bad, and the ugly of traveling - nasty hostels and bed bugs included.  I have made relationships that I feel certain will last a lifetime.  Suddenly this change-hating girl seems to actually crave change and all the new adventures that change brings with it.  

So now I have to wonder if it's possible that "home" can mean more than just your childhood family home.  Maybe home can mean wherever you feel most yourself at that current time in your life.  I have learned more about myself and this beautiful world in one and half years than I ever thought possible.  I have a new appreciation for every inch of God's creation and a desire to explore it.  

Now before anyone panics and thinks that I'm now destined for a life of wandering and eating berries and twigs (MOM)...Another thing I have learned while being as far away from home as geographically possible - I love home.  I love the feeling of being around people that love you unconditionally.  There will never be anything like it, and I am so thankful that I have that to go back to one day.  I know that I will know when the right time is to make my way back to the homeland and that when I do, I won't regret it.  I also know that I will never stop wanting to see more of the world.  

So here I am, two people in one body.   Two homes within one heart.  One home is constant and one is constantly changing.  I think the most important thing I've learned is that you don't have to forget where you came from in order to see where you are going.  I believe one can't exist without the other.  So if home is where the heart is...I think I have enough room in my heart now to feel at home wherever I am.  

(But nothing will ever beat my mom's home-cooking, long chats with my dad, goofing off with my sisters or cuddling with my pets.)

Singa-what??

Most of you probably had the exact same question that I did when I accepted my position here.  "Where the heck is Singapore??"  I definitely had to do a google search to see where it was that I had agreed to spend the next two years of my life.  All I knew was it was somewhere in Asia...it was far away...and yep that's about it.  Oh and that they have some of the strictest laws in the world?  Awesome.

Let the research begin.  My dad being the study bug that he is would send me regular emails with random facts about Singapore.  I thought I would put together a list that would hopefully give those who have never heard much about Singapore an idea of what the country is like.

• Singapore is the second smallest country in Asia 
• (despite what many from home thought, it is NOT in China - although I do get a kick out of letters that are sent to Singapore, China haha) 
• It is tiny...like the dot on the map is bigger than the country itself.

• English is the official language of Singapore - I know weird huh?  
• The four main languages are English, Chinese, Malay and Tamil.
• Children are raised learning English and their mother tongue - however, local English is usually a broken English called "Singlish"  
• example: "I don't want to." ---> "Don wan lah"
• example: "I can't do it." ---> "Can not"

•  Singapore is practically on the equator
• It is HOT and HUMID all year round - I am a Houston girl, but trust me...it's on a whole other level over here 

• Yes, they cane people here.  

• No, you will not get caned for chewing gum. 

• Yes, they do have fines for EVERYTHING.

• Singapore is definitely a safe and well-run place.  It is the perfect place to go as a single, female, first time traveler (which I think is the only reason my parents "allowed" me to come here :) )

• It is a melting pot of different Asian and Western culture - On one street you might find a noodle and rice hawker stall (aka yummy greasy local food for about $1-$3) and next door will be a McDonald's or Subway.  Sometimes the abundance of western food and clothing options makes me have to remind myself that I am in fact living in Asia.

Overall, life here is simple and easy.  Being able to speak English with everyone and eat my usual comfort food when I crave it, has made my life very comfortable and my transition as smooth as possible when moving across the world.  Living is a bit pricey, food and travel are cheap, and a trip to the doctor costs only $20 without insurance.  

I think I made a pretty good choice for my first jump across the ocean.

Long Overdue

December 27, 2009 I hugged and kissed my family before boarding a plane in Houston, Texas bound for Singapore. 

I can't put into words the emotions I felt in those final moments.  Until that point, I had only said I was going to move to Singapore.  Suddenly I was at the airport with no turning back.  (Although my mom did tell me more than once that I could in fact change my mind and go back home - much to her dismay I had already made up my mind...although to say that I didn't consider it would be a total lie.)  My dad suggested one last family hug and prayer before I had to go through security.  When he started to cry it was all over for the rest of us.  I am so thankful and blessed to have a family that loves and cares for me so much.

A few million tears and four big hugs later, I was on my way through security to board the plane that would take me to Singapore - alone.  I don't think I have ever been alone in my entire life.  Being from a huge Southern family does not really allow for alone time.  In fact, just the word "alone" makes me uncomfortable.  Maybe that is exactly why I felt like I needed to make this huge leap of faith - to conquer my strongest fear.

I have lived in Singapore for almost a year and half now, yet I remember this day with such clarity.  I went through every single possible emotion in that 24 hours.  Excitement, fear, anxiety, pride, loneliness, and hope.  Although I didn't blog at the time, I did write a journal entry during my layover in Dubai.  Here is a snippet...

"When I realized my phone wasn't going to work here [Dubai], I got overwhelmed.  I rushed around the airport to find a calling card and then wandered aimlessly until I found a pay phone.  I couldn't get my card to work which sent me into a total panic.  Finally a random saint helped me and I heard it ringing.  The second my dad answered I broke down.  Not really sure why but it was so relieving to hear his voice.  After he calmed me down I was able to pull myself together and realize that I was in Dubai! As Dad said, "The hardest part is over." 

Embarrassingly enough, my first international meal of my new and exciting life was ... McDonald's.  I couldn't help it.  I knew I'd like it, it's familiar and it was the first thing I saw (and smelled).  I think the fact that I ate a quarter pounder with cheese in another country makes it much fancier.  Good news is McDonald's = yummy in any language. 

Despite my earlier meltdown, I feel much more at ease than I thought I would.  I'm really doing this.  Next stop...Singapore."

And so my adventure began.  I am so glad that I made the decision to come here.  I have experienced more than I ever thought I would in this lifetime and for that I will always be thankful.

I hope that everyone (especially those at home) enjoy my somewhat "backwards blog" as I attempt to look back on the last year and half.  Be patient with me...I'm still new at all of this. I love and miss you all so very much and I wouldn't be who I am today without you.

                                    Arriving at Immigration December 29, 2009

                      My first Singapore sunrise...jet lag has never been kind to me

                       The Merlion - Singapore's symbol - half mermaid and half lion

                             Singapore skyline - from the top of Tiger Tower

                                             Enjoying the view